By Feryial Parvez

It started with a phone call that shattered my heart and changed my life forever. My youngest sister, her voice trembling with fear and exhaustion, finally admitted the truth she had been hiding for seven years: she was trapped in a toxic, abusive marriage. “I don’t know what to do,” she whispered, her words heavy with pain. Her husband had alienated her from friends and family, controlled every aspect of her life, and subjected her to relentless financial abuse. While there were no visible bruises, the scars of emotional and psychological abuse ran deep.

I sat in my home in London, UK, feeling a mix of heartbreak, anger, and determination. My sister’s pain was unbearable to hear, and I knew I had to act. I couldn’t let her continue living in fear, especially with her two beautiful daughters growing up in such a toxic environment. What followed was a two-year journey that tested the strength of our family, my sister’s resilience, and my own ability to navigate a system that often fails women in abusive relationships.

The Beginning of the Fight

The problems in my sister’s marriage had started on day one. Her husband’s controlling behavior was evident early on, and his mother played a significant role in creating a toxic environment. But like so many women in abusive relationships, my sister hid the extent of the abuse. She endured it silently for seven years, hoping things would improve. By the time she called me, she was emotionally drained, scared, and unsure of how to escape.

Our family is spread across the globe—my parents live in Montreal, Canada, my middle sister in Sydney, Australia, and I in London. Despite the distance, we came together to support her. I began contacting lawyers in New Jersey and New York, researching the best options for her. I told her, “I have lawyers on speed dial. Just tell me when you’re ready.” A few months later, she made the call, and the process of untangling her life from her abusive husband began.

The Long Road to Freedom

The divorce process was far more grueling than any of us could have imagined. My husband played a crucial role by covering the legal fees, which took the financial pressure off my sister and allowed us to hire the best lawyer we could find. But even with a strong legal team, the journey was emotionally and mentally draining. Her ex-husband was uncooperative at every turn, dragging the process out for two years. He used every tactic he could to intimidate and exhaust her, knowing how vulnerable she was.

There were days when my sister was completely frozen by fear. She worried about how she would co-parent with a man who had caused her so much pain. She doubted her ability to rebuild her life and provide a stable future for her daughters. Watching her struggle was heartbreaking, but it also fueled my determination to see her through to the other side. I became her advocate, her cheerleader, and her shoulder to cry on. I was there for every phone call, every court date, and every moment of doubt.

Why I Became a Divorce Coach

When the divorce was finally finalized, almost two years after it began, we all breathed a collective sigh of relief. My sister and her daughters were safe, and she could finally start to heal. But the experience left a lasting impact on me. I realized how broken the divorce process is, especially for women coming out of abusive relationships.

The legal system is designed to divide assets and determine custody, but it completely ignores the emotional and psychological toll of leaving an abusive marriage. My sister had to make life-altering decisions and fill out complex financial documents while still reeling from years of abuse. There was no emotional justice, no validation of her pain, and no acknowledgment of how hard it was to walk away.

I became a divorce coach because I never want another woman to go through what my sister endured without support. My sister was lucky to have a family that rallied around her, but many women don’t have that. Even with our support, the process was overwhelming. I saw firsthand how fear of the future can paralyze someone, and how important it is to have someone by your side who understands what you’re going through.

A New Chapter

Today, we are almost a year past the day my sister’s divorce was finalized. She still has a long journey ahead, but she is safe, and so are her daughters. She is slowly rebuilding her life, finding her voice, and rediscovering her strength. Watching her transformation has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life.

As a divorce coach, I now help other women navigate the daunting process of leaving toxic relationships and rebuilding their lives. I provide the emotional support and practical guidance that so many women desperately need but often don’t receive. My sister’s journey taught me that divorce is not just a legal process—it’s an emotional one. And while the legal system may not provide emotional justice, I can.

My hope is that by sharing my story, I can inspire others to seek help, find their strength, and know that they are not alone. No one should have to face the pain of divorce—especially after years of abuse—without support. My sister’s courage changed her life, and it changed mine too. Now, I’m using that experience to help others find their own path to freedom and healing.

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