This week's quote
"Dear friend, what they told you was wrong about you is actually what's strong about you." — Sincerely, Divorced
This week's resource
Core values are a grounding force in the divorce journey and in coparenting, but making core values a guiding force in all areas of your life is a complete game changer. Hence this week's resource, The Live Your Values Deck: Sort Out, Honor, and Practice What Matters Most to You, which comes in the form of a card deck. When I began to identify my core values (with the help of my incredible therapist), and then started practicing the behaviors that brought those values to life, I became a more confident person and a better parent, daughter, sister, friend, and co-parent. I'd also say I became a better employee even though I don't think my employer thought so. Getting clear on your values creates boundaries for what you will accept and how you express yourself—and that makes some people uncomfortable because the power they once believed they had over you is now a power that you know is within you. —Bethany
This week's tools
Chat GPT is a resource we never imagined would be so useful for navigating divorce. So many members of our local support group are using AI to communicate with their ex-partners, we thought it would be helpful to round up a few of the best tools out there. Our only suggestion is that you read through the automated response that's generated so you can make appropriate edits like making the message more concise or personalizing the language to capture your voice. Bottom line, whether you are using AI to perfect a message you are writing or you paste a message from someone and ask AI to craft a response, it helps ensure that communication–especially in high-conflict situations–is productive and not personal.
• Goblin.tools has a formalizer section that you enter text into and you can choose to have it be made more professional, less emotional, more polite, etc.
• Pi is an emotionally intelligent AI tool that's great to use when you have to relay important information and/or cannot answer with simply a yes, no, or 👍.
The month ahead
We hope to see you at an upcoming in-person or virtual event. Both kinds of experiences have been rewarding for us and the people who have attended so we are going to keep offering both as a way to spread more love and hope. We are especially grateful for our Sincerely, Divorced Ambassadors, Jenn and Kim, for helping us create more opportunities to build community and advance the mission to eradicate the isolation of divorce.
Looking ahead, after making such a big deal about moving to Eventbrite we've decided that it's not the best fit. The last thing we want is to make your life more difficult because of our growing pains so thank you for bearing with us.
October 20, 6 p.m. - Trivia Night at Independent Brewery
October 27, 11 a.m. ET - Virtual Coffee & Conversation
October 29, 5:30 p.m. - Taco Tuesday at Sol Oaxaca Bel Air
November 1, 6 p.m. ET - Virtual Happy Hour
November 17, 1 p.m. - Music in the Barn at Boordy Vineyards
This week's reel
We have so much fun creating reels it's hard to believe that we were once afraid to do it. Our favorite from this week was hard to choose, but because it had 800 likes in the first 90 minutes, we think it's this one.
Our thanks
We are humbled by the positive feedback we've received about the "What Matters to Children of Divorce at Any Age or Stage" ebook. Thank you for your support and for sharing it with someone who might find it helpful.
XX, Bethany & Hillary